imc indymedia

Los Angeles Indymedia : Activist News

white themeblack themered themetheme help
About Us Contact Us Calendar Publish RSS
Features
latest news
best of news
syndication
commentary


KILLRADIO

VozMob

ABCF LA

A-Infos Radio

Indymedia On Air

Dope-X-Resistance-LA List

LAAMN List




IMC Network:

Original Cities

www.indymedia.org africa: ambazonia canarias estrecho / madiaq kenya nigeria south africa canada: hamilton london, ontario maritimes montreal ontario ottawa quebec thunder bay vancouver victoria windsor winnipeg east asia: burma jakarta japan korea manila qc europe: abruzzo alacant andorra antwerpen armenia athens austria barcelona belarus belgium belgrade bristol brussels bulgaria calabria croatia cyprus emilia-romagna estrecho / madiaq euskal herria galiza germany grenoble hungary ireland istanbul italy la plana liege liguria lille linksunten lombardia london madrid malta marseille nantes napoli netherlands nice northern england norway oost-vlaanderen paris/Île-de-france patras piemonte poland portugal roma romania russia saint-petersburg scotland sverige switzerland thessaloniki torun toscana toulouse ukraine united kingdom valencia latin america: argentina bolivia chiapas chile chile sur cmi brasil colombia ecuador mexico peru puerto rico qollasuyu rosario santiago tijuana uruguay valparaiso venezuela venezuela oceania: adelaide aotearoa brisbane burma darwin jakarta manila melbourne perth qc sydney south asia: india mumbai united states: arizona arkansas asheville atlanta austin baltimore big muddy binghamton boston buffalo charlottesville chicago cleveland colorado columbus dc hawaii houston hudson mohawk kansas city la madison maine miami michigan milwaukee minneapolis/st. paul new hampshire new jersey new mexico new orleans north carolina north texas nyc oklahoma philadelphia pittsburgh portland richmond rochester rogue valley saint louis san diego san francisco san francisco bay area santa barbara santa cruz, ca sarasota seattle tampa bay tennessee urbana-champaign vermont western mass worcester west asia: armenia beirut israel palestine process: fbi/legal updates mailing lists process & imc docs tech volunteer projects: print radio satellite tv video regions: oceania united states topics: biotech

Surviving Cities

www.indymedia.org africa: canada: quebec east asia: japan europe: athens barcelona belgium bristol brussels cyprus germany grenoble ireland istanbul lille linksunten nantes netherlands norway portugal united kingdom latin america: argentina cmi brasil rosario oceania: aotearoa united states: austin big muddy binghamton boston chicago columbus la michigan nyc portland rochester saint louis san diego san francisco bay area santa cruz, ca tennessee urbana-champaign worcester west asia: palestine process: fbi/legal updates process & imc docs projects: radio satellite tv
printable version - js reader version - view hidden posts - tags and related articles

'I Never Promised You A Ruse Garden' A Letter From Michael Moore To George W. Bush

by C/O Diogenes Saturday, Jun. 28, 2003 at 5:30 PM

I don't always agree with Michael Moore but he can be fiendishly witty - as in this Mock Letter to Geeeeee Duhhhhbya.

'I Never Promised You A Ruse Garden'

A Letter From Michael Moore To George W. Bush

6-27-3

Dear Lt. George W. Bush,

I hope you don't mind me referring to you by the only true military rank you ever achieved, that being the one from your on-again, off-again "days" in the, um, Texas Air National Guard. Ever since I saw you in that flyboy outfit, landing on that ship, I assumed you now wanted to be addressed by your military title, as opposed to the civilian rank imposed on you by your dad's friends.

So, Lieutenant, I was wondering, would you do me a favor?

Could you PLEASE do better than a ROSE BUSH?

I saw the guy on TV yesterday that your boys found, the Iraqi who said he had "planted" some nuclear plans in his "back yard" in Baghdad -- 12 years ago -- "under a rose bush."

Woo boy. That's a good one. Do you really think we are as dumb as we look? I know our fascination with "American Idol" and Scott Peterson may make us Americans look a little light in the head, but when it comes to lying to us to lead us into war, we really do demand a bit more of an EFFORT and a FOLLOW-THROUGH.

You see, George, it's not the lying and the doctoring of intelligence that has me all upset. It's that you've had control of Iraq for over two months now -- and you couldn't even find the time to plant just a few nukes or vats of nerve gas and at least make it LOOK like you weren't lying to us.

You see, by not faking some evidence of weapons of mass destruction, it shows that you thought no one would mind if it turned out you made everything up. A different kind of president, who believes that the American public would be outraged if they ever found out the truth, would go to great lengths to cover up his subterfuge.

Johnson did it with the Gulf of Tonkin. He said our ships were "attacked" by the North Vietnamese. They weren't, but he knew he had to at least make it LOOK like it happened. Nixon said he wasn't "a crook," but he knew that wasn't enough, so he paid hush money to the burglars and somehow had 18 1/2 minutes erased from a tape in the Oval Office. Why did he do this? Because he knew the American people would be pissed if they found out the truth.

Your blatant refusal to NOT back up your verbal deception with the kind of fake evidence we have become used to is a slap in our collective American face. It's as if you are saying, "These Americans are so damn apathetic and lazy, we won't have to produce any weapons to back up our claims!" If you had just dug a few silo holes in the last month outside Tikrit, or spread some anthrax around those Winnebagos near Basra, or "discovered" some plutonium with that stash of home movies of Uday Hussein feeding his tigers, then it would have said to us that you thought we might revolt if you were caught in a lie. It would have shown us some *respect*. We honestly wouldn't have cared if it later came out that you planted all the WMD -- sure, we'd be properly peeved, but at least we would have been proud to know that you knew you HAD to back up your phony claims with the real deal!

I guess you finally figured that out this week. It started to appear that millions of us were calling you on your bluff -- those "fictitious reasons for the fictitious war." So you quickly produced this man and his rose bush and some 12-year old piece of paper and some metal parts. CNN broke in at 5:15pm and screamed they had the exclusive! "IRAQI NUCLEAR PLANS FOUND!" But a few good reporters started asking some hard questions -- and, barely 3 hours later, your own administration was forced to admit the plans were "not the smoking gunî proving that Iraq had weapons of mass destruction.

Oops.

Never a good idea to rely on a bush, Lieutenant.

Yours,

Michael Moore

www.michaelmoore.com

MMFlint@aol.com

PS. Sorry, I still can't get that padded flyboy suit out of my head. I know, I need help. But when you landed on that carrier, and that banner read, "MISSION ACCOMPLISHED," just what mission was that that was accomplished? 'Cause by my count, more than 50 of our young soldiers have died since you said the mission was accomplished. Anarchy still reigns, the Brits are losing kids, too, and wacko fundamentalists now seem to ready to rule the land. Women are already being told to cover their face and shut their mouths, store owners who sell liquor have been executed, and movie theaters showing "immoral" Hollywood movies have been forced to shut down. And hey, this isn't even west Texas! Maybe you could get back into that jumpsuit, fly over to Baghdad and land at the former Saddam International Airport, jump out and give one of those big happy waves -- under a sign that reads, "MISSION IMPOSSIBLE."

Report this post as:

LATEST COMMENTS ABOUT THIS ARTICLE
Listed below are the 10 latest comments of 70 posted about this article.
These comments are anonymously submitted by the website visitors.
TITLE AUTHOR DATE
There is definitely... Diogenes Saturday, Jun. 28, 2003 at 5:32 PM
Our Letter To Mike the people Saturday, Jun. 28, 2003 at 5:42 PM
Have another... Diogenes Saturday, Jun. 28, 2003 at 6:00 PM
ROFL fresca Saturday, Jun. 28, 2003 at 6:10 PM
fresca fresca Saturday, Jun. 28, 2003 at 6:38 PM
Amen X fresca Saturday, Jun. 28, 2003 at 6:57 PM
lies? x Saturday, Jun. 28, 2003 at 7:51 PM
x fresca Saturday, Jun. 28, 2003 at 8:05 PM
give me an example x Saturday, Jun. 28, 2003 at 9:01 PM
Michael Moore vs. George W. Bush Bush Admirer Saturday, Jun. 28, 2003 at 10:52 PM
just a regular guy from Flint wavemaster Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 2:23 AM
And another thing wavemaster Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 2:34 AM
x fresca Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 5:14 AM
Logical Fallacy debate coach Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 12:06 PM
^ faker/KOBE Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 12:17 PM
^ KOBE SBM Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 12:29 PM
^ faker/KOBE Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 12:31 PM
^ KOBE SBM Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 12:33 PM
fresca, hear me x Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 5:00 PM
x fresca Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 5:01 PM
x fresca Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 5:11 PM
fresca, don't be rude x Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 5:20 PM
Read fresca Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 5:23 PM
x fresca Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 5:23 PM
Logical Fallacy debate coach Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 5:24 PM
make your point fresca wavemaster Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 5:36 PM
Debate coach wavemaster Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 5:39 PM
Wavemaster fresca Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 6:07 PM
The difference between Moore and Coulter Bush Admirer Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 6:15 PM
WOW!!!! debate coach Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 6:34 PM
but debate coach, BA thinks Rush is god, so BA is a lost cause oink Sunday, Jun. 29, 2003 at 8:01 PM
2 cents born to follow Wednesday, Sep. 03, 2003 at 11:30 PM
Michael Moore gone Wednesday, Sep. 03, 2003 at 11:51 PM
OneEyedMan KPC Thursday, Sep. 04, 2003 at 1:15 PM
KPC gone Thursday, Sep. 04, 2003 at 1:51 PM
OneEyedMan KPC Thursday, Sep. 04, 2003 at 7:23 PM
CHicken Boy, you mean the Oscar... nonanarchist Thursday, Sep. 04, 2003 at 7:49 PM
he's a great speaker Hank Thursday, Sep. 04, 2003 at 8:04 PM
nonanarchist is a dope anti-nonanarchist Thursday, Sep. 04, 2003 at 8:39 PM
Hank nonanarchist Thursday, Sep. 04, 2003 at 8:53 PM
nonanarchist anti-nonanarchist Thursday, Sep. 04, 2003 at 8:59 PM
Wait and see. nonanarchist Thursday, Sep. 04, 2003 at 9:00 PM
pipsqueek er..Non whatever Hank Thursday, Sep. 04, 2003 at 9:05 PM
Hank nonanarchist Thursday, Sep. 04, 2003 at 9:07 PM
OneEyedMan KPC Thursday, Sep. 04, 2003 at 9:12 PM
Hank ol' buddy... nonanarchist Thursday, Sep. 04, 2003 at 9:25 PM
Oh, and to the faker... Hank Thursday, Sep. 04, 2003 at 9:26 PM
I didn't see the movie Hank Thursday, Sep. 04, 2003 at 9:37 PM
You can't see the distortion here, Hank? nonanarchist Thursday, Sep. 04, 2003 at 9:57 PM
nonanarchist George W. Bush Thursday, Sep. 04, 2003 at 10:00 PM
Are you stupid? Hank Thursday, Sep. 04, 2003 at 10:18 PM
What? nonanarchist Thursday, Sep. 04, 2003 at 10:22 PM
Interesting how... nonanarchist Thursday, Sep. 04, 2003 at 10:40 PM
OneEyedMan KPC Friday, Sep. 05, 2003 at 8:44 PM
Then how do YOU answer this, Chicken Boy? nonanarchist Friday, Sep. 05, 2003 at 8:48 PM
OneEyedMan KPC Friday, Sep. 05, 2003 at 9:08 PM
Chicken Boy nonanarchist Friday, Sep. 05, 2003 at 9:17 PM
OneEyedMan KPC Friday, Sep. 05, 2003 at 9:23 PM
You don't see Moore's lies... nonanarchist Friday, Sep. 05, 2003 at 9:53 PM
to the above poster 'non---------' Trainer Friday, Sep. 05, 2003 at 10:26 PM
Michael Mooron MM da liar Saturday, Sep. 06, 2003 at 1:34 AM
been there done that . Saturday, Sep. 06, 2003 at 2:15 AM
Trainer nonanarchist Saturday, Sep. 06, 2003 at 7:20 AM
to Non..................... . Saturday, Sep. 06, 2003 at 10:11 AM
. $ Saturday, Sep. 06, 2003 at 10:28 AM
ahh . Saturday, Sep. 06, 2003 at 10:40 AM

Local News

Why Should California Choose De Leon Over Feinstein? O10 9:55PM

Change Links September 2018 posted S02 10:22PM

More Scandals Rock Southern California Nuke Plant San Onofre A30 11:09PM

Site Outage Friday A30 3:49PM

Change Links August 2018 A14 1:56AM

Setback for Developer of SC Farm Land A12 11:09PM

More problems at Shutdown San Onofre Nuke J29 10:40PM

Change Links 2018 July posted J09 8:27PM

More Pix: "Families Belong Together," Pasadena J02 7:16PM

"Families Belong Together" March, Pasadena J02 7:08PM

Short Report on the Families Belong Together Protest in Los Angeles J30 11:26PM

Summer 2018 National Immigrant Solidarity Network News Alert! J11 6:58AM

Watch the Debate: Excluded Candidates for Governor of California M31 5:20AM

Change Links June 2018 posted M28 7:41AM

The Montrose Peace Vigil at 12 Years M22 8:01PM

Unity Archive Project M21 9:42AM

Dianne Feinstein's Promotion of War, Secret Animal Abuse, Military Profiteering, Censorshi M17 10:22PM

CA Senate Bill 1303 would require an independent coroner rather than being part of police M10 9:08PM

Three years after OC snitch scandal, no charges filed against sheriffs deputies M10 8:57PM

California police agencies violate Brown Act (open meetings) M02 8:31PM

Insane Company Wants To Send Nuke Plant Waste To New Mexico A29 11:47PM

Change Links May 2018 A27 8:40AM

Worker-Owned Car Wash on Vermont Closed A27 5:37AM

More Local News...

Other/Breaking News

Elder Aliyah to Israel, Like Abraham and Sarah O18 6:35PM

Politoscope plurivalent O17 6:59AM

Paraphysique du microcosme macrocosme O15 6:44AM

September 2018 Honduras coup update O15 3:31AM

The Nation Unites Against Brian Kemp, Most Racist Secretary of State in US O14 7:34AM

The Nation Unites Against Brian Kemp, Most Racist Secretary of State in US O14 7:23AM

Paraphysique de l'ubérisation O13 7:56AM

22 Ways Trump Has Increased US Deficit By 4 to 5 Trillion Dollars O12 10:34PM

Debunking Some Anti-Prop 10 Propaganda O12 6:56AM

Plus d'hôpitaux, à bas les aéros O12 6:38AM

When Banana Ruled (documentary) O11 3:00AM

Outstanding Report By RAMOLA D &Dr.Tomo Shibata O10 9:17PM

Dark Clouds Gather on Horizon for Financial System, Warns International Monetary Fund O10 1:51PM

Fbi pure evil & immorality O10 5:39AM

Reality Check: Palestinian-Israeli Coexistence is a Big Lie O09 7:40PM

Voiceless Animals: 2018 Candidates They Oppose O09 7:01PM

IMF Lowers Global Growth Projections and Raises Concerns of Financial Crisis O09 3:27PM

Canitie, l'inhumanité vieillit O09 7:13AM

L'anarchie en quelques exemples O07 6:50AM

100 Ways GOP Have Stolen Elections Since 1876 O06 12:03AM

Proximospective de l'univocité réifiée O05 6:27AM

“Kava-no!!!” O04 6:42PM

Trump & Palestine vs. Genesis, Rashi & The Land of Israel O03 6:29PM

The Criminality of the Elites O03 11:35AM

Business de l'inhumanitaire O03 7:51AM

Marriage Rape/Date Rape Highest Rapes O02 2:59PM

Women I Know Get Raped - Too Many Times To Count! O02 2:55PM

Women In USA Have Stockholm Syndrom O02 2:50PM

More Breaking News...
© 2000-2018 Los Angeles Independent Media Center. Unless otherwise stated by the author, all content is free for non-commercial reuse, reprint, and rebroadcast, on the net and elsewhere. Opinions are those of the contributors and are not necessarily endorsed by the Los Angeles Independent Media Center. Running sf-active v0.9.4 Disclaimer | Privacy