With green legs and torsos protruding from bathing suits, surfboards under their arms, countless Martians have begun to appear in this ritzy, mellow San Diego beach community. One of them, named Rex, said “Now that late capitalism has invaded outer space, in the form of the agreement to let that American millionaire buy his way into the international space station, we have decided it is time to cure you Earthlings of your ills. We have purposefully remained out of contact with most of you over the past three thousand years because we have been really offended that your Euro-culture has associated our planet with violence. What irony! We have never had a war, let alone a weapon, on our fair home. How many have you had--in the past one hundred years alone? Fear not, we have not come to hurt, but to cure. We know the source of your troubles: they are a manifestation of the post-modern Self-Other relationship. We hoped that you people would figure things out more or less on your own, (we even implanted special knowledge inside the mind of Prof. Jacques Derrida) but we feel that the time has come for direct action. We will teach all Earth creatures about true democracy--Martian democracy! We have chosen La Jolla because we have heard about the anti-democratic fee referendum that the administration of the University of California is trying to push through here, against student interests. Also we like nice weather and pretty flora.”

The title of this story is supposed to end "outer space!"

Martians Invade La Jolla, Saying They Are Sick Of The Fast Pace of Outer Space

With green legs and torsos protruding from baggy bathing suits, surfboards under their arms, countless Martians have begun to appear in this mellow, ritzy San Diego beach community. One of them, named Rex, said “Now that late capitalism has invaded outer space, in the form of the agreement to let that American millionaire buy his way into the international space station, we have decided it is time to cure you earthlings of your ills. We have purposefully remained out of contact with most of you over the past three thousand years because we have been really offended that your Euro-culture has associated our planet with violence. What irony! We have never had a war--not even a weapon--on our fair home. How many have you had--in the past one hundred years alone? Fear not, we have not come to hurt, but to cure. Your demonization of us is symptomatic of your biggest problem, which can be explained using the post-modern Self-Other relationship. We hoped that you people would figure things out more or less on your own, (we even implanted special knowledge inside the mind of Prof. Jacques Derrida) but we feel that the time has come for direct action. We will teach all Earth creatures about true democracy--Martian democracy! We have chosen La Jolla because we have heard about the anti-democratic fee referendum that the administration of the University of California is trying to push through here, against student interests. Also, we like nice weather and pretty flora.”

they must be Dynes possee! Never fear, we shall be free at last once they show us the errors of our attempts to support for what we thought was democracy, and debunk our silly myths about its nature.

they must be Dynes possee! Never fear, we shall be free at last once they show us the errors of our attempts to support for what we thought was democracy, and debunk our silly myths about its nature.

Greetings, Earthlings.

We have come to La Jolla, home of UCSD, one of the most evil universities in existence, because we have a message for you.

Our satellite monitoring equipment has picked up signals from this bastion of student oppression and military technology that the administration is trying to raise fees even higher than they already are. They are lying to students, claiming that this fee increase is covered under financial aid, when, in fact, there is no guarantee of that. The referendum was put together by a hand-picked committee of students who were known to vote against the wishes of their constituents, and who were given a template by the administration of how they should write it.

UCSD, being the classist institution that it is, is trying to raise fees and drive out lower-income students. We, the Martians of the working class, have come to protect the students from this.

We know not of this "dynes possee" mentioned in a previous post, but we shall seek them out and work with them, along with anyone else who wants to take a stand against this outrageous affront against students and the working class.

Solidarity Forever,

Martian Fee Opposers

Greetings, Earthlings.

We have come to La Jolla, home of UCSD, one of the most evil universities in existence, because we have a message for you.

Our satellite monitoring equipment has picked up signals from this bastion of student oppression and military technology that the administration is trying to raise fees even higher than they already are. They are lying to students, claiming that this fee increase is covered under financial aid, when, in fact, there is no guarantee of that. The referendum was put together by a hand-picked committee of students who were known to vote against the wishes of their constituents, and who were given a template by the administration of how they should write it.

UCSD, being the classist institution that it is, is trying to raise fees and drive out lower-income students. We, the Martians of the working class, have come to protect the students from this.

We know not of this "dynes possee" mentioned in a previous post, but we shall seek them out and work with them, along with anyone else who wants to take a stand against this outrageous affront against students and the working class.

Solidarity Forever,

Martian Fee Opposers