DON'T SEEK THE APPROVAL OF OTHERS TO FEEL WORTHY!

The Face of Love - Nick Ralls

I do not seek the approval of others... I do not need others to make me feel good.. I have a treasure house within myself which gives me all the resources I need to feel good about myself.

WHEN we look to others to make us feel good about ourselves... when we seek the approval of other people.. we are planting the seeds for unhappiness.

Our feeling of self worth needs to come from ourselves.

By seeking the approval of others, you are really saying that their opinion of you is more important than the opinion you have of yourself.

You will find yourself conforming to the expectations of others and you will lose your own identity in the process.

When we come from being needy of someone, or clingy to someone, we put out to the universe that we are lacking and we attract into our lives people and experiences that will show us just how much we are lacking.

If you depend on your wife or husband or friend to give you your self esteem, then you are treading dangerous ground.

Because those you depend upon to build your confidence and self esteem can so very easily take it away from you if they fall out with you or leave your life.

If your self esteem comes from within yourself and given to you by yourself than no one but yourself can take it away from you... which you are not likely to want to do.

It is alarming but not too amazing that so many of us seek approval from those who make the least perfect role models.

People lacking in confidence and self esteem put people on pedestals and seek recognition from those who lack even more confidence and have even lower self esteem

The result can be catastrophic to say the least.

So too it is with relationships... people draw upon people to make them feel good who cannot possibly make them feel good because they are more messed up than themselves.

How can we possibly expect happiness when we put our faith in and build our self confidence around a relationship with someone who hasn't even got faith in themselves let alone any confidence in themselves?

We so often seek opinions from those who are least able to give them.

If I can afford a diamond ring I would prefer to buy it from the high class jeweller rather than from the local market stall.

When I wanted to help others to heal their lives I learnt hypnosis and NLP from the best... I wanted my training from Richard Bandler, the creator of NLP, Paul McKenna, Michael Neill, Dick Sutphen, Ormond McGill, arguably the best hypnotists in the world.

I learnt from Louise L Hay about healing the past and changing my life around. The best.

I learnt magic from the best magicians and so on.

And yet so many of us take important decisions about how we run our life, our relationships, our health and our careers from those who are least able to assist us.

Within ourselves is a wealth of intutition, commonsense and love to tap into.. enough of the powerful stuff our universe is made of to give us all the resourceful strength we need to shine magnificently.

Yet why are we so often frightened to seek our own power and to claim our own magnficence, instead turning to others to make us feel worthy and loved.

At any point in our lives someone else can leave us or decide to attack us instead of being kind to us.

If our reliance is on that person to make ourselves feel good or worth something then our whole world can come tumbling down and this is not a good thing to happen.

So find that powerhouse of love and well being within your own heart to make you feel really good... and don't allow anyone else to take it away from you.

If you seek a role model... then for goodness sake find someone who has made a success of their life, is a loving, kind and wonderful person and if you are seeking a relationship make sure you do not put hope in anyone who you doubt, has a history of disrespect or does not treat you precisely the way you wish to be treated.

Never allow yourself to give your power away to others.

Rely on yourself to hold your self esteem and confidence.

Trust yourself... appreciate yourself.. see the magnificent and wonderful person you are...and believe you are capable of doing anything. It is this belief in yourself that can literally move mountains.

It can bring back to you, boomerang fashion, all the good things in the universe.

This belief will repel all those who are likely to disrespect and dishonour you because of their poor behaviour.

And this belief will attract those into your life who will reflect your highest good and treat you with the respect, sensitivity and honour that you so richly deserve.

So dear and special friend... delve into that treasure house within your own soul to get the resources to change your life into day by day magnificence and bliss

I love you

Nick Ralls