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Why Men Die First

by Humor Tuesday, Dec. 02, 2003 at 8:11 PM

The age old question has always been why do men die first? Why do Women tend to outlive men? Here is one answer to this age old question.


Why men die first is a question that has gone unanswered for centuries,

but now we know: If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her

from the rat race, you're a male chauvinist; if you stay home and do the

housework, you're a pansy. If you work too hard, there's never any time

for her; if you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum. If she

has a boring repetitive job with low pay, this is exploitation; if you

have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your lazy

behind and find something better. If you get a promotion ahead of her,

that is favoritism; if she gets a job ahead of you, it's equal

opportunity. If you mention how nice she looks, it's sexual harassment;

if you keep quiet it's male indifference. If you cry, you're a wimp; if

you don't, you're an insensitive bastard. If you make a decision without

consulting her, you're a chauvinist; if she makes a decision without

consulting you, she's a liberated woman. If you ask her to do something

she doesn't enjoy, that's domination; if she asks you, it's a favor. If

you appreciate the female form and frilly underwear, you're a pervert;

if you don't, you're gay. If you like a woman to shave her legs and keep

in shape, you're sexist; if you don't, you're unromantic. If you try to

keep yourself in shape, you're vain; if you don't, you're a slob. If you

buy her flowers, you're after something; if you don't, you're not

thoughtful. If you're proud of your achievements, you're full of

yourself; if you aren't you're not ambitious. If she has a headache,

she's tired; if you have a headache, you don't love her anymore.



Men die first because they want to.
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what a victim Meyer London Tuesday, Dec. 02, 2003 at 10:59 PM
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