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Dumb, Dumber And Dumbest

by Charley Reese Sunday, Nov. 16, 2003 at 3:19 AM

It is dumb to suppose that the way to decrease crime is to make sure all potential victims of violent crime are disarmed. It is dumber yet to believe that a criminal will obey a gun-control law. No bank robber or rapist has ever set out and then stopped and said, "Gosh, I don't have a permit for this weapon, so I guess I'd better not rob that bank or rape that girl." No serial killer has ever said: "Gosh, I can't kill this person with an unregistered weapon. That would be against the law."

Dumb, Dumber And Dumbest

By Charley Reese

11-14-3

The positions of most urban liberals on firearms are dumb, dumber and dumbest.

 

It is dumb to suppose that the way to decrease crime is to make sure all potential victims of violent crime are disarmed. It is dumber yet to believe that a criminal will obey a gun-control law. No bank robber or rapist has ever set out and then stopped and said, "Gosh, I don't have a permit for this weapon, so I guess I'd better not rob that bank or rape that girl." No serial killer has ever said: "Gosh, I can't kill this person with an unregistered weapon. That would be against the law."

 

The dumbest idea is to suppose that an inanimate object can turn a noncriminal into a criminal. To believe that guns cause crime is as stupid as believing that hammers and saws cause houses. It is the grossest kind of mindless superstition to suppose that some magical qualities of an inanimate object can overpower the human will.

 

A gun is neither a romantic nor a sinister object. It is just a plain tool, like a hammer, a saw or a router. It can be used for recreation, and it can be used for self-defense. Like a chain saw, it can hurt its owner if the owner is careless or stupid. But the modern firearm is inherently safe. The gun cannot load itself or fire itself. Properly stored and used, it is safer than a stepladder or a swimming pool or an automobile. It is even safer than eating.

 

Here are the statistics from the National Safety Council: In the year 2000, firearms killed 600 Americans accidentally. That's 600 out of nearly 280 million. Here are the other numbers of accidental fatalities for that year: autos, 43,000; falls, 16,200; poisons, 11,700; drowning, 3,900; ingestion of food or other object, 3,400. The only number of fatalities lower than accidental firearms deaths is that from poison gases - 400.

 

The next time some urban liberal tells you he just wants to make firearms safer, tell him to consult the National Safety Council, stick the statistics where the sun doesn't shine and then go straight to hell for being a big, fat liar. Sorry to put it so harshly, but I can't abide lying politicians.

 

I was born into a home with guns, I have lived my whole life in homes with guns, I have raised my children in homes with guns, and I have worried enormously more about their scuba diving and sky diving than I have about their contact with firearms.

 

Furthermore, when I married, I assumed the responsibility for the safety of my wife and children. I was never willing to bet their safety on the possibility of my skills in unarmed combat overcoming an intruder. I suppose it comes from my Celtic blood, but when it comes to defending those I love, I'll kill any number of people to keep them safe, and I have always made it my business to have the means of doing so at hand. I gave up fair fights in the second grade. I have seen too often with my own eyes what psychopathic scum can do to innocent human beings. To use Mr. Donald Rumsfeld's style of speaking, do I trust human beings? No.

 

The Founding Fathers of our country, as politically incorrect as it might be to say so, were revolutionaries who had to use violence to overthrow tyrannical rule. They wrote the Second Amendment not to make sure people could go duck hunting, but to make sure that they would have the means, if necessary, to overthrow tyranny again. The meaning of the Second Amendment is clear to all but those who hate the idea of a free people. It states that "the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed." It does not say members of the militia or policemen or soldiers. It says the people, and it means every individual American citizen in this God-blessed land, whatever shyster lawyers have to say notwithstanding.

 

Unfortunately, the world is still ruled by force, and a disarmed people are not free, but at the mercy of those with arms. I hate the very concept of being "at the mercy" of anyone.

 

If you believe in the right to life, then you must believe in the right to have the means to defend that life. Unless you wish to spend years learning the bow and arrow and the broadsword, I'd suggest you join 4 million others and me in the National Rifle Association, lest a bunch of dumb urban politicians put you and your family at the mercy of any wandering criminal.

 

 

© 2003 by King Features Syndicate, Inc.

 

http://reese.king-online.com/Reese_20031114/index.php

Report this post as:

OneEyedMan

by KPC Sunday, Nov. 16, 2003 at 3:27 AM

I saw the name of this article and immediately thought of me, myself and I. I'm an idiot.

Report this post as:

Dumb, Dumber And Dumbest

by Sheepdog Sunday, Nov. 16, 2003 at 3:29 AM

No the name of the article

most assuradely describes

me to a "T". If there's an idiot

on this borad, and there's lots

of us left-wing and anrachists

wingnut whackos here, I'm the

big cheese of idiots.

Report this post as:

Dumbester

by Meyer London Sunday, Nov. 16, 2003 at 3:34 AM

Don't dare try and sell me short. I've got to be one of the most clueless ones anywhere. I'm so dumb I make you two look good, and that pretty dumb. With idiots like us around, dumb will never be an issue at this IMC. And there's more just like us on other IMC's. A whole army of dumb. Well, not a whole army. Maybe 100 or so worldwide IMC idiots. The rest of us marxists and anrachists are just plain stupid, but that's another topic.

Report this post as:

Sheepdog = KPC = Meyer London

by Adult Supervisor Sunday, Nov. 16, 2003 at 4:19 AM

Which of your names do you prefer Sheepdog?

Would you rather we call you Sheepdog? Or do you prefer your KPC handle? or is it your Meyer London handle that you like best?

Make up your mind. We would like to address you by your proper handle.

Report this post as:

just call me...

by -- Sunday, Nov. 16, 2003 at 5:57 AM

...your superior in all things. Then kindly die. No one will notice.

Report this post as:

clueless as usual

by Sheepdog Sunday, Nov. 16, 2003 at 6:16 AM

oooo so someone thinks we are the same person.

I'm everywhere and maybe right next door with an arsenal of toys.

And I am an expert at all of them from unarmed combat, edged weapons to all SORTS of firearms. Then the Army taught me a few things. Then I studied the various technologies available afterwards.

I am a man of peace, but I am not the above authors.

Report this post as:

Of course...

by Sheepdog Sunday, Nov. 16, 2003 at 4:02 PM

...this is an entirely anonymous message board, and I have no way of verifying what I just claimed.

As you know, anyone may say anything on the Internet, so you'll just have to take my word that I am an expert with weapons. I had hoped to sound much more intimidating that I actually did, which wasn't much at all.

Really, I can kill you if I wanted to. Honest. Assuming that I knew where you lived.

Are you scared yet? Please?

Report this post as:

as opposed to...

by Sheepdog Sunday, Nov. 16, 2003 at 5:56 PM

...the credibility of someone who high jacks another's nick.

If you meet me in person you would never know what I can do unless you screwed with me. That's the way I like it.

Report this post as:

little monkey...

by snapneck Sunday, Nov. 16, 2003 at 7:04 PM

quiet yourself.

Don't make us use the ignore feature on you.

Report this post as:

talking to me?

by Sheepdog Sunday, Nov. 16, 2003 at 8:07 PM

what ever you do PLEASE DON'T use the ignore feature...I can't stand it! You'll hurt me so much, I'll just weep in emotional torment.

PLEASE DON'T!!!! NO!!! STOP!!! arrrrrrgggg.......

Report this post as:

You're so vain...

by Carly Simon Sunday, Nov. 16, 2003 at 8:21 PM

you probly think this song is about you.

Don't you?

Don't you?

http://www.carlysimon.com/vain/vain.htm

Report this post as:

me popping you is all I wanted hun

by cat stevens Sunday, Nov. 16, 2003 at 9:27 PM

i may be vain, but rocks need lettin go, y'know

Report this post as:

Yes, just like the credibility of someone who makes...

by Sheepdog Sunday, Nov. 16, 2003 at 11:05 PM

...wild, unconfirmable claims on the Internet.

I told you all that you wouldn't know what I could do unless you met me and screwed with me. Unfortunately, since I don't know you, and we are never likely to meet, you can pretty much do what you like to me in here, and all I can do is sit here and whine.

Luckily, I happen to like verbal abuse, which is why I write the things I do.

I'm begging for it.

But anyway, are you afraid of me yet? I hope someday to actually have something with which to back up my wild claims of being a death merchant (other than the subscription to Soldier of Fortune Magazine, that is), but until then, I'll just have to settle for making vaguely threatening promises on the Internet.

I really was in the Army, but I'm afraid my four-year hitch in the motor pool didn't really prepare me for a career as a professional (or amateur) killer.

Somebody...please be afraid of me. I'm being as ominous as I can.

Report this post as:

hey buzz lips

by Sheepdog1 Sunday, Nov. 16, 2003 at 11:10 PM

I thought you were going to ignore me. I was scared. Really.

Wow I'm sure glad you didn't and decided to ride on my nick, sidesaddle, like a lady.

Report this post as:

and furthermore...

by Sheepdog Sunday, Nov. 16, 2003 at 11:34 PM

it's rude to imp me like that. You don't see me imping anyone do you? My nick is really the last shred of dignity I have in this miserable capitalist society, and you're stripping me of it. I'm really getting sick of it now. Sick, sick, sick, and tired. IT'S MINE! MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE!!!!!!!!!!!! SO STOP IT!!!!

Don't make me threaten your life agian. I might put sneak into a Republican Party National Convention and put strychnine in the punch. I'm a trained killer, mind you. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Boo!

Report this post as:

I might put sneak into a Republican Party National Convention

by Sheepdog1 Sunday, Nov. 16, 2003 at 11:42 PM

Don't you think they already have enough sneak as it is?

Report this post as:

And once I'm in there, I'll...

by Sheepdog Sunday, Nov. 16, 2003 at 11:50 PM

...I'll...well, I don't know. Stop up all the toilets, or something.

But I'll make them rue the day!

Report this post as:

I'm interested in the sneak

by Sheepdog Sunday, Nov. 16, 2003 at 11:55 PM

Would that be before or after you stoped up the toilets?

Timing is everything, you know.

Report this post as:

put in the sneak

by Sheepdog Monday, Nov. 17, 2003 at 12:04 AM

You'll have to forgive me for the confusion. I'm not a good speller and my grammar is atrocious. Not to mention the fact that I'm occasionally high on pot or drunk when I post my comments. Please bear with me, as I'm coming off a bender.

Report this post as:

speaking of joining

by Sheepdog Monday, Nov. 17, 2003 at 12:52 AM

Join the largest special interest in America. The Gun Owners of America or the Don't Tread On Me party.

God made man, Colt made them equal.

Report this post as:

Are you scared yet?

by Sheepdog Monday, Nov. 17, 2003 at 1:01 AM

I'm trying really hard. I read that last bit somewhere, and it scared me, so I thought I'd try it on you guys.

C'mon, guys! At least pretend to be scared of me!

Report this post as:

Okay, Sheepdog

by Meyer London Monday, Nov. 17, 2003 at 1:39 AM

I'm scared of you.

If I even so much as SEE a gun, I wet my pants.

Report this post as:

Well then...

by Sheepdog Monday, Nov. 17, 2003 at 6:48 AM

Guns

Since we're on the subject, har har, I thought I'd recommend a few of my favorites.

Wild Pig - ......................a .10 Mossberg Roadblocker w/slugs.

Screaming snakes- ......a .10 Mossberg Roadblocker w/wire bead 6

Slinking Elk-..................a nice .308 -your choice. Go American, although German is nice.

Feral dogs- ...................a Ruger GP 100 .357 stainless

then there was the time we fired off Charles' .50, using armor piercing surpluses(?) and

scaring the other shooters with that thing. Muzzle flash the size of my VW...

Oh well, we had had far too much beer that day.

Report this post as:

Sheepie -- Living the American Dream!

by nonanrchist1010 Monday, Nov. 17, 2003 at 3:15 PM

Drunks with Big Guns!

Report this post as:

yeah

by Sheepdog Monday, Nov. 17, 2003 at 3:34 PM

Aint it great? I Love America.

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