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Right Winger's Lexicon

by Diogenes Wednesday, Feb. 12, 2003 at 11:18 AM

I'm nothing if not fair and balanced. You decide. Do you like my definitions or BA's. We distort you decide.

Despite BA's pretensions to literary compilation I would rather think that ther is a little of the lexicographer in all of us.

Like any Anthropoid sub-species the Fascist Right Wing has their own code words.

Here are just a few. By pure coincidence they mirror BA's.

Freedom of Religion: You have the right to be a God Fearing Born Agin’ Protestant.

1. Absolute and slavish adulation of any Republican in office. Craven and unquestioning adulation and compete and unreserved credulosity for any utterance of the Ruling Junta.*
2. Someone who does not question government pronouncement no matter how ludicrous.
*(Exempted are true Patriots like Ron Paul who has this strange notion that the government should follow the Constitution.)

Worker’s Rights: The right to shut up and take what I give you.

Free Market: The right to purchase goods produced in a Third World Sweatshop and to exempt American Corporations from being Environmental Good Neighbors. Also “free trade” agreements that allow U.S. Manufacturer’s to avoid U.S. Environmental Regulations by exporting jobs just across the border where they can dump their waste wherever they damn well please.
Also included are government subsidies to privileged industries, such as armaments, and any company in the Fortune 500. This includes, but is not limited to, Corporate Farm Subsidies, advertising expenditures overseas for multi-billion dollar companies, and general preference in contracting.

Balance Budget: Stealing from trust funds to cover up profligate waste and unconstitutional expenditures.

Drug War: Eliminating the competition to the Elite’s Drug import and distribution businesses. Secondary is to protect U.S. Pharmaceutical companies from competition to their deadly Psychiatric drugs by low cost street drugs with fewer adverse side effects.

9-11: The work of 19 Arab Terrorists who flunked flight school and do not show up on any of the published Passenger Lists by UAL or AA. They all died in their horrific attack except for the 8 that were not even in the United States at the time.

Patriot Act: A wholly justified raping of the Constitution to satisfy the needs of the ruling elite and to sidestep those silly notions of Freedom Of Speech, The Right to Assemble Peaceably and seek redress of grievances, The right to be secure in your person against unreasonable search and seizure, To avoid having to get a search warrant to spy on the private communications of formerly free citizens, and to piss on Thomas Jefferson’s, George Washington’s, Patrick Henry’s, and the thousands of men and women who have died to preserve those liberties Grave’s.

Reasoned Dissent: I agree with everything that the Elite’s want and oppose anyone who thinks for themselves.

Republican: A loyal American who has by pure chance, and out of the purest of motives” adopted policies reminiscent of the Third Reich, Joseph Stalin, and Mao Tse-tung.

Close Minded: Anyone who does not believe that the solution to all international political problems is to “kill them all and let God sort them out”.

Fair Minded: Someone who believes that the correct response to international disagreements is to: “kill them all and let God sort them out”.

Deserving Rich: Anyone who has an annual Gross over 250,000. Also known as “Real Americans”.

Corporate Greed: Greed is good.

Duty: The Obligation to do what you are told by the government, and to wage war against anyone who dares to arrive at a contrary conclusion.

Morality: “kill them all and let God sort them out”. Also don’t ever talk about sex. And no dancing.

Universal health care: Ensuring by law the profitability of Insurance Companies, Hospitals, the members of the AMA and erecting barriers to any health care provider who did not attend a Pharmaceutical Based Curriculum at an accredited (by the AMA) institution.

Public Opinion:
1. The manufactured assent of the Sheeple.
2. The results of slanted opinion polls.
3. The falsely reported results of opinion polls. Not to be confused with actual opinions held by thinking people.

Abuse of Power: The failure to “kill them all and let God sort them out”.

Fair: Any action which furthers the best interests of the top 1 percent of wealthy individuals.

Unfair: Any policy which applies equally to all citizens including the privileged, monied elite.

Independent Media: The major networks and newspapers particularly Faux News and Rush Limbag. (ultimate ownership and control of which is in the hands of about 50 wealthy families).

Economic equity : The confiscation and redistribution of earned personal income by the government to be redistributed to Bond Holders. Formerly called Fascism.

Living wages: Whatever is left over after we have paid the Bond Holders. Shut up and sit down commoner.

Civil liberties: The silly notion that in a free country the rights of the individual citizen are sacred. Concocted by such crazy left wing ideologues as John Stuart Mill, John Locke, Patrick Henry, Thomas Paine, George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Alexander Hamilton, John Jay, Samuel Adams, John Adams, Benjamin Franklin, Andrew Jackson, James Madison, and John Marshall.

Quality Education: Just enough so that you can work in the factory, as a servant, and believe without question what you are told. (Exempted are the children of the elite who attend private schools that do not use the corrupted curriculum foisted on the schools by the elite.)

Peace: The silly notion that we should live in harmony with each other and abide by that stupid Golden Rule of “do unto others as you would have them do unto you”.

Anti-War Demonstrators: Goddamned Pinkos who deserve to be strung up for daring to question the rightness or justness of killing people as a solution to international problems.
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Listed below are the 10 latest comments of 5 posted about this article.
These comments are anonymously submitted by the website visitors.
Put this in your snifter and drink it. Diogenes Wednesday, Feb. 12, 2003 at 11:24 AM
Subscribe now! M. Wednesday, Feb. 12, 2003 at 11:42 AM
Your Caption was Wrong. Diogenes Wednesday, Feb. 12, 2003 at 11:47 AM
Sheepdog likes it. Sheepdog Wednesday, Feb. 12, 2003 at 11:58 AM
Shucks, twarnt' nuthin' Diogenes Thursday, Feb. 13, 2003 at 8:49 AM

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