Overheard
At the White House
Laura: "George W., you can't take this
seriously. I haven't seen you this worked up since you heard Saddam tried
to kill your daddy. Get a grip on yourself, no one is going to shoot you
in the 'groined' area."
George: "Ah tell you, Laura, this
threat is serious. Sue Niederer is comin' for me. I'm hunkered down
here an' I'm not goin' out until my boys take her in."
Laura: "Right, George W. And just
how do you expect she's going to find you?"
George: "I'm the President,
Laura. Every shit kicker from here to Abilene done knows where to find
me. I live in the White House, for God's sake!"
Laura: "That's my point, George W.
You live in the White House. What do you think Sue Niederer is gonna do,
walk right in here an' shoot yeah?"
George: "She gonna shoot me in the
nuts, Laura! That's what she said. She gonna aim her shooter at 'em
and taken 'em out!"
Laura: "She'd have to have some really
good aim, there, George W."
George: "How you know that she
doesn't.... Hey, I know what you're saying. My pecker ain't that
small."
Laura: "Look George W., she'd need to
have one great scope and a steady hand to hit 'em."
George: "How would you know how big
mine are compared to someone else?"
Laura: "George W., I'm from Texas and I
do have brothers."
George: "What's that mean?"
Laura: "Never mind. Let's get
back to Sue Niederer."
George: "I'd rather talk about my
nuts."
Laura: "Sue Niederer has got a piss
ant's chance of shootin' you in the nuts, George W."
<silence>
Laura: "George W., what are you doin'?"
George: "I'm tryin' out this here
bullet proof jock strap."
Laura: "I didn't know they made
those."
George: "They don't, I had this one
custom made."
Laura: "That goes without sayin'.
Nothin' but custom made fits you down there."
George: "There you go again, First Lady,
disrespecting my Presidential pecker. Ah think I'll call up my boys again
and see if'n they've moved on Niederer."
Laura: "There's a war goin' on, George W.
and all you can think about is your nuts. Mrs. Niederer lost her son in
your war and all you can think about is your nuts. Tell you the truth, George W.,
if'n somethin' happened to your nuts, I wouldn't miss them."
George: "Threatenin' the President's
nuts is a crime and I'm the President and these here are my nuts."
Laura: "Put 'em away George W."
George: "Look First Lady, these here
are my nuts and you're either with 'em or your 'gainst them."
Laura: "And where's you're penis?
Am I going to have to 'smoke 'em out'?"
George: "Bend over Laura, I'm a
hankering for your 'anus of evil.'"
Laura: "I sure like it when you talk
dirty to me, George W."
George: "Bring 'em on. Let's get
a pretzel and do the Clinton thang."
Laura: "Bring 'em on....."