Christmas Carols You Won't Hear at the White House

To the tune of O Tannenbaum

O, Santorum

O, Santorum

You're such a raving bigot!

So full of hate

So anti-gay

Now tell me what

Would Jesus say?

O, Santorum

O, Santorum

You're such a raving bigot!

O, Santorum

O, Santorum

Your name's a frothy mixture!

You stain my sheets

On Christmas Day

If I engage

In anal play

O, Santorum

O, Santorum

Your name's a frothy mixture!

O, Santorum

O, Santorum

You'll always be remembered.

Each time a dick is up a butt

You'll wish you had

Kept your mouth shut

O, Santorum

O, Santorum

You'll always be remembered.



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To the tune of Joy to the World

Bomb all the world, George Bush has come,

Let earth explode in flame!

Let Bechtel and Exxon

prepare for lots of income,

Let Halliburton sing,

Let Halliburton sing,

Let Ha-aa-li-bur-ton and Lockheed sing.



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To the tune of God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen

Don't rest ye merry immigrant

or else you'll lose your pay;

you're working in a sweatshop now for 20 cents a day,

to dress us all in Gap and Nike in the USA;

oh tidings of poverty and pain,

tidings of pain,

oh tidings of poverty and pain!



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To the tune of We Three Kings

We three kings of Bush's Cartel

need a lot of oil to sell.

On dead children

we'll be buildin'

All of our new oil wells.



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To the tune of You're a Mean One, Mr Grinch

You're a mean one, Mr Bush

You've cut health care for our kids,

The global warming's heating up,

the jobs don't pay enough,

Mr Bush,

You're an unelected leader,

and we know what Jeb did!

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http://www.outspokenclothing.com/christmas.html



All contents © Copyright OutspokenClothing.com 2003.

Oops forgot to include a link to explain the santorum references!

http://www.spreadingsantorum.com

Here's another good one --



The Twelve Days of Bushmas

(sung to the tune of The Twelve Days of Christmas)

A BUZZFLASH READER SATIRE

by Rand Ozier

On the first day of Bushmas, Dubya took from us,

the federal budget surplus.

On the second day of Bushmas, Dubya took from us,

Clean air and water, and the federal budget surplus.

On the third day of Bushmas, Dubya took from us,

three million jobs, clean air and water, and the federal

budget surplus.

On the fourth day of Bushmas, Dubya took from us,

Freedom of speech, three million jobs, clean air and water,

and the federal budget surplus.

On the fifth day of Bushmas, Dubya took from us,

All of our allies, freedom of speech, three million jobs,

clean air and water, and the federal budget surplus.

On the sixth day of Bushmas, Dubya took from us,

Rights of privacy, all of our allies, freedom of speech,

three million jobs, clean air and water, and the

federal budget surplus.

On the seventh day of Bushmas, Dubya took from us,

Trust in the system, rights of privacy, all of our allies,

freedom of speech, three million jobs, clean air and water,

and the federal budget surplus.

On the eighth day of Bushmas, Dubya took from us,

Hope for the future, trust in the system, rights of privacy,

all of our allies, freedom of speech, three million jobs,

clean air and water, and the federal budget surplus.

On the ninth day of Bushmas, Dubya took from us,

Overtime pay, hope for the future, trust in the system,

rights of privacy, all of our allies, freedom of speech,

three million jobs, clean air and water, and the

federal budget surplus.

On the tenth day of Bushmas, Dubya took from us,

Well-funded schools, overtime pay, hope for the future,

trust in the system, rights of privacy, all of our allies,

freedom of speech, three million jobs, clean air and water,

and the federal budget surplus.

On the eleventh day of Bushmas, Dubya took from us,

Endangered species, well-funded schools, overtime pay,

hope for the future, trust in the system, rights of privacy,

all of our allies, freedom of speech, three million jobs,

clean air and water, and the federal budget surplus.

On the twelfth day of Bushmas, Dubya took from us,

Many soldiers' lives, endangered species, well-funded

schools, overtime pay, hope for the future, trust in the

system, rights of privacy, all of our allies, freedom of speech,

three million jobs, clean air and water, and the

federal budget surplus.

Let's break this down.

I guess you could substitute any name in this song and it would be just as accurate, given that it's nonsense but lets break it down.

Many soldiers' lives,

Actually only a few hundred. I agree that one American life is worth all the lives in the arab world but this is a war and soldiers will die.

endangered species,

Not sure what this non-sequitor is supposed to mean but Bush has certainly done little to put new species on the list.

well-funded schools,

School funding hasn't gone down at all since Bush took office primarily because it's not a Federal issue as much as a state issue.

overtime pay,

Overtime pay has not changed at all. I know it sounds fancy to say that but the fact is that no overtime pay legislation has been enacted.

hope for the future,

Uh, maybe for you, but then I suspect you didn't have much anyway if a fucking PRESIDENT for Christ;s sake can make you lose it.

trust in the system,

Same as above

rights of privacy,

Nothings changed. Squeal about PA1 and PA2 all you want but your constitutional rights are the same now as they were 3 years ago.

all of our allies,

France, Germany and Russia oh and Mexico...good riddance. Alot of help they've always been. Besides they hven't really gone anywhere anyway. They know what side of the bread is buttered.

freedom of speech,

Same as rights of privacy



three million jobs,

Uh you do know that unemployment continues to drop and the economy continues to grow at a pace not seen for about 20 years. But I guess that desn't count. By the way, remember a little gift of the arab world...9-11...that did wonders for the economy didn't it?

clean air and water,

Same as it ever was. It should be cleaner, I'll agree but Bush has about the same enviromental record as all the rest.



and the

federal budget surplus.

So what? we ARE at war jackass. Money well spent.