TRIPP AND THE GOP had been clearly warned by voters in the United States that extorting the president with MY PORNOGRAPHY that I PAID FOR WITH MY TAX MONEY could possibly jeopardize the safety of the entire world and so it came to pass.

Mass media conglomerates were also clearly and duly warned that the public would not tolerate the extortion of the president of the United States on public airwaves and CATV systems. Newspapers were also scorned and condemned.

Tripp is also responsible for nearly 3000 dead potential voters at the WTC, a hole in the pentagon, and over 10000 dead foreign potential voters.

The subsequent economic damage not including what was stolen by the Bush cartel now looms near 1 trillion US dollars.

According to global newswires the CHINESE CENTRAL GOVERNMENT is ANGRY and would like to see a recount of the votes in TIAWAN. This announcement was obviously inspired by GOP propaganda indicating US recognition of the election results as legitimate. This information came from an unreliable source. The CCG can be contacted through many channels both diplomatic and economic.

Sorry about that earthquake in China. I was aiming for Japan but my earthquake focusing tool is not very accurate.

One Palestinian martyr tried to break rank today and was captured by Yassir Arafat.

Al Qaeda was not seen on my CATV system today and might want to consider a name change. They do not want to play PSYCHOLOGICAL WARFARE GAMES with me.

I will fire Donald Trump if he removes the banner from MY BUILDING in New York City that says YOUR FIRED.

RICHARD CLARKE was not responsible under president Clinton to prevent domestic sabotage. Fred Hanson was. He is currently serving a life sentence in a federal prison.

The ARAB LEAGUE had a quick meeting and decided to call it off.

Ariel Sharon is STILL DOG MEAT as far as I am concerned.

And in Haiti, unconfirmed reports are coming in that the alleged revolutionary GAY PHILLIP, wants to marry BABY DOC whatever his name is. I have no problem with this. This should keep GAY PHILLIP off the street corner.

I need to get to work fixing my BIG GOLD LAMP and all these trivial problems are starting to irritate me.

Todays special OZZY edition will go unpublished today.

by Albert Kada
Independent Terrorist Journalist
World's only publisher of computer viruses besides Microsoft.
designer of the Patriot softwareless electronic voting machine.
designer of the IONOSPHERE HOG.
Stolen from the the frequently unpublished newspaper "The American Blasphemer" please copy