The Top Eleven Reasons Bush Wants to Go to the Moon and Mars



Bush, the man who has driven the US into near-bankruptcy and the dollar into an international collapse, while overextending US resources to the breaking point in Iraq and Afghanistan, now wants to spend hundreds of billions of dollars on a grandiose scheme to conquer the moon and Mars. Why?

Here are eleven reasons I can think off just offhand:

1. If he can divert the public's attention into space, maybe they won't notice how badly he has f-cked everything up on Earth.

2. In his never-ending quest to be likened to a real president (he's tried parallels to everyone from Lincoln to FDR to Reagan), Bush is hoping maybe someone will imagine he is like JFK, who inspired the US to set their sights for the moon. Of course that was back when America had the money to spend on such projects. And the only similarity between Bush and JFK is that they both had ruthless fathers.

3. With US corporations losing global clients left and right here on Earth due to Bush's exploitve, offensive policies, Bush figures he should now offer his corporate friends rights to set up shop on the moon or Mars - no pesky other nations to have to accommodate by behaving with integrity. Part of the plan, according to numerous reports from would-be "space speculators" is to conduct mining operations and set up garish tourist stations. What would be next? Gigantic neon signs across the face of the full moon that spell out DRINK COKE or VIAGRA?

4. He thinks all those out-of-work technical folks will get all excited, imagining that they will now have insured work for the next decades. Sorry, techies, but most of the hardware and software for any space missions will likely be manufactured in India or southeast Asia because NASA will, within the next year or so, be privatized. Do you really think these corporations will pay you $80,000 a year when they can get four Indian PhDs for the same price?

5. The intelligence/creativity level of the remaining Bush PR team (those dumb and self-disrespecting enough to stay on) is at an all-time low. "Bush Goes to Mars" is the best scheme they could come up with, having burnt themselves out with the "Turkey in Baghdad" bit.

6. Billy Graham and Pat Robertson found something in Revelation they think is a prophesy that Armageddon will actually take place on Mars, not in Iraq, as earlier believed.

7. Orrin Hatch confided to Bush that he believes God lives on Mars, not Kolob (the "cosmic planet" of Mormon scripture).

8. Unable to set up concentration camps for liberals and/or non-white, non-Protestant people here on Earth without pissing too many people off, Bush hopes to ship all his enemies to Camp Luna.

9. Bush found that bankrupting the American government was harder than he thought it would be and figured financing a mission to Mars would do the trick.

10. Bush knows he won't be reelected and is desperately trawling for some accomplishment that will be so dazzling that future generations will not remember him just as "That evil bastard."

11. Dick Cheney had a vision that there was oil on the moon.



As for the rest of us, I bet there's just one good reason we can all think of for getting a manned spacecraft to Mars, preferrably one-way:

Send Bush.



Bush Sets Sights for Mars, Moon

http://www.boston.com/news/nation/articles/2004/01/09/missions_to_mars_moon_u

"Bush can't pull off a trip to eat turkey in Baghdad"

He seemed to have actually pulled that off pretty well.

BTW, what's wrong with going to Mars? Why does the left insist on being utterly negative about EVERYTHING?





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Well, at least you tried.

Better luck next time.

But I doubt you'll have any more success.

nonanarchist

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Looks like there's TWO flags on Mars.

nonanarchist

*** This comment was posted from an IP associated with a disruptive poster. The MD5 hash of their IP is 3d1cb767fe4087bf4011b1780dce0407. This value is the same even if the user uses another name. Only posters deemed disruptive by the editorial collective will have this text appended to their posts. We apologize for any erroneous misidentifications.

wrt to Mars, well of course let's SEE if there was life there in the distant past, and shed some fucking lite on our crazy existence here; they mite b e connected, you know.

the lunarlollipop may become an isotopical dumpster, and good for us.

#34 --Don't forget!!--BinLaden is still LOOOOOOSE!!!

I notice that LA Indymedia is having the same problem that several other of the most popular indymedia sites are having, including the UK indy - infestation by "disruptive rightwing provocateurs" (what a nice "title" for what they really are). They haunt these progressive sites, hounding the writers and posters they find most threatening. If they had something constructive to offer themselves in terms of a point of view or philosophy of life, or even literary content,, then they would be writing articles and posting their material on sites that do share their fascist point of view - like FreeRepublic. Instead, all they can do is try to tear at people who do have lives and make constructive efforts to make a difference.

Many of these folks are well-organized, some under the control of local cells of the RNC, others just frustrated angry loners. In any case, they are becoming a pain in the ass.

I applaud the approach being taken by the LA indymedia, and encourage other indy sites to do the same: identify them so everyone who sees their vitriolic little "messages" know what game is being played.

"Instead, all they can do is try to tear at people who do have lives and make constructive efforts to make a difference. "

Stop deluding yourself. You accomplish nothing. The average leftist IMC visitor is simply a juvenile Bush hating sheep. If America or Israel are doing it ...it must be bad.

the "operatives" as you so ridiculously call them are here because the views commonly expressed here range from inane to simply offensive. It's fun to keep shoving your noses in it. Your views are utterly irrelevant and your actions are empty (there aren't more than a handful of you and no one really cares what you think) so why not at least come here and try to teach you.

But alas, I fear you're all much too closeminded and hateful. Oh well. It's your loss.

BTW. Freerepublic is much the same as far as I'm concerned. Your closeminded compatriots on the other end of the spectrum. I will say however, that those people have you beat hands down as far as the overall influence they can and will wield.

Is probably between 25 and 45, involved in some kind of political organization, election, grassroots group, or peace vigil. They're reading, but not spending time responding, because they've stopped reading the comments.

If you take a close look, most of the argument is between KPFK folks, defenses of anarchism against charges of authoritarianism or nationalism, and the occasional add on comment. There's also me. I'm being the lone semi-radical for now. I seem to shut you trolls up pretty good with my occasionally coherent rants.

Perhaps if they figure something out, there will be another golden age (or is that green day) of indymedia.