London, England
28 AUGUST 2004
Lately, I have had cravings for orange soda... and I have acted on these. The pulpy ones like Aranciata and Orangina are better than the syrupy tasting Tangos and Fantas. Even though I am without a television, they got to me somehow. I have been seduced into a zombie-like subordination to the will of the Orange Fizzy.
'The Madness of King George' was the last film I remember watching on television. King George pissed blue and was mad as hell that he lost the colonies. The blue piss was a symptom of his illness -madness (porphyria, probably). I have never pissed in the blue... and for this I am thankful.
Blue piss madness. I am partial to the song "Blue Skinned Beast" by the British ska band Madness. An album purchased for the chart hit "Our House" yielded the much more challenging beast.
Here you have this medal you can even melt it down
Or frame it in the living room every time you turn around
Have a drink on me
Have a drink on me
Orange soda, King George, madness and now... Madness.
I heard you shout for yesterday, but I was sleeping on the job
And I dreamt of fighters miles away whose lives I had to rob
Have a drink on me
I put it down to the company
Three cheers to the blue skinned beast hip hip!!!
Actually, I'm not too sure if 'The Madness of King George' was the last film I saw on television. I saw parts of the original 'Die Hard' last week while in North London surfing Olympic action; but can we really call 'Die Hard' a film anymore? These days, isn't it more like a recruiting video for the US Department of Homeland Security?
Homeland. Security.
I can fly your loved ones to you
With guarantee of no return
And if John Wayne's dummy's bounce off
Don't look shocked when it comes your turn
Have a drink on me
I put it down to company
Unaided by photo albums or family super 8 films, there are just a few things that I can recall from the seven months my family lived in Trenton, Michigan.
Trenton. South and West of Detroit. Weekly excursions to Scot Lad with my mother. Eating Velveeta® cheese and crackers at the kitchen counter. Cracker crumbs. Vernors. Our German neighbor's house burning down in the night and smoldering the day after. Some kid whacking me in the head with a hammer as I played in the backyard...
I imagine it would be more accurate to write: Kraft Velveeta cheese product on crackers.
...that hammer to the head was an early wake-up call. Obviously, I had angered this kid... let's call him Bobby... I had made him angry and I haven't a clue as to why or how. Socrates would probably argue that my unexamined five-year existence demanded, at a minimum, a boot to the head. But Bobby's Thor-like blow to my tiny skull knocked me out cold.
Three cheers to the blue skinned beast hip hip!!!
To the blue skinned beast hip hip!!!
Kraft Velveeta® cheese product on crackers. The Kraftfoods website devoted to the creamy cheese-like goodness of Velveeta® provides an answer to the FAQ "Why is Velveeta® shelf stable?"
"Velveeta® contains a blend of natural cheeses and other wholesome
ingredients that are cooked as the product is made. This cooking process
allows Velveeta® to be shelf stable for several months. Velveeta® is also
formulated within the parameters of the Food Research Institute guidelines
for shelf stable cheese products."
So, now we know. Hip hip hip hip!!!
Two weeks ago, a friend in Chicago sent me an email asking me to join in a progressive action against the current government/ president. This invitation was preceded by others informing me of articles in the Democratic Underground, the release of 'Fahrenheit 9/11' and MoveOn PAC's campaign to force Fox News to change their trademark "Fair and Balanced."
After doing research on forwarded email messages a couple of years ago, I often indulge in the terrible habit of reading most of those that I receive. This friend... let's call her Bobbi... sends me quite a few. Usually she avoids the simple recycling of messages and often adds her own commentary. Although potentially an annoyance, I appreciate her efforts to keep me informed in a more personal way while I am studying in London. This is typical of what Bobbi might write:
"Hello Everyone! The fund-raising tour of Bush 'Go F*** Yourself' 2004
apparently doesn't include money for education -Bush's education.
First, here's a link to a photocopy of the Party Loyalty Pledge (nice Stalinist
ring to it, don't you think?) those who attended rallies in NM had to sign:
www.democraticunderground.com/top10/04/165.html#4
...Even better than this is the sound of (obviously not ass-kissing mainstream)
journalists laughing at Bush when he tried to answer a question posed to him
at a minority journalists' convention. I swear, this answer sounds like a
fourth grader's evasive reply to a question when it's clear he hasn't done his
homework. You'll love it:
www.majorityreportradio.com/weblog/archives/000581.php
Enjoy!"
With my adrenaline working overtime the day I read this message, I decided to send a reply to everyone in Bobbi's email group and offer a suggestion.
To be a proponent of democracy in times like these often means being stuck in the rut of "at least I know what I don't like," and this seems little more than a comfortable place from which to wield our tiny idea crushing hammers. I don't like 45 million people being without access to affordable healthcare. I don't like where we find social security, the economy or the deficit that used to be a surplus. I don't like our government's willingness to send soldiers to war and violently impact people in countries we can't point to on a map of the world. I don't like all these things, but complaining about them does not make them disappear.
We can criticize only so much before our questions beg us to act. In response to Bobbi's message I did the unthinkable... I selected "reply to all" and began typing a call to action:
"Hello everyone. My name is Adam and I am a friend of Bobbi's... sorry
for 'replying to all' but, as many of you live in Illinois, and Illinois is likely
to go to Kerry by a landslide, I have a suggestion. We should clear our
schedules for the last week in October and the first week in November and
volunteer our services to the Democratic parties in our neighboring states
(Wisconsin, Iowa, Michigan and Minnesota for those of us in the
Midwest) that are still up for grabs.
What say you? A plan?"
Not exactly a call for revolution, right? There was more 'Mississippi Burning' than 'Reds' to my suggestion... I wanted us to do something, rather than continue to complain. The rhetoric of "Any Body But Bush" is not exactly critical or engaging, but the inertia of a culture of complaint -as I've already alluded to- drives me mad... mad... mad... but without the blue piss.
I heard you shout for yesterday, but I was sleeping on the job
And I dreamt of fighters miles away whose lives I had to rob
Have a drink on me
I put it down to the company
Three cheers to the blue skinned beast hip hip!!!
In response to my adopt a state suggestion, a beast of a different sort raised his gloriously knob and horn encrusted helmet-head. Let's call this beast Bob... with a heavy laboring sigh. This is what Bob wrote after he had read my message:
"From a friend of Bobbi's who does not live in Illinois, and lives with daily
reminders of 9/11 and [the] general political idiocy inside 'The Beltway',
kindly stay home and mind your business locally.
'Hate Bush' is not a family value, nor an intelligent means of determining
our next president. John Kerry will drive this country into the ground, and
given his own description of being [stunned] for 40 minutes after learning
we were being attacked on 9/11, and describing himself as 'unable to speak'
during that time, I hardly think that he is a man we want in office to react
in an emergency situation."
Bob. How would you respond? Should one respond? Let it slide Snowman, one of my friends said.
I can fly you to your loved ones but I can promise no return
To a shell-shocked God forsaken where craters still burn
Have a drink on me
Have a drink on me
Trenton. Attending my first Major League Baseball game, a Tigers game... my father buying me an inflatable souvenir tiger on a stick. I'm not sure if it was Paws (the current Tiger mascot) or not. What I am sure of is that -like most inflatable toys- it GOT deflated pretty easily.
Deflated ideas...
"Dear Bob. I respond to you alone because it seems that your message was
aimed particularly at my thoughts rather than the group as a whole. Although,
it must be said that by sending your message to everyone on Bobbi's list, it is
obvious that your intention was to put me in a special place: something
rectangular, made of pinewood and 6 feet under, no?
Nowhere in my message did I write anything that could be construed as an
expression of hatred towards George W. Bush. I do not "hate" Bush. What I
did attempt to communicate is that I do not wish him to "win" a second term
in office. My call to action was a suggestion that I thought might aid in
making this reality. We live in a democracy. The election in November is a
general one, not just a local one; and, as has been demonstrated the past four
years, federal decisions have the capacity to effect localities everywhere, even
localities in the Middle East and Central Asia.
As for your suggestion that I stay at home and mind my local business, I have
voted in every presidential election since turning 18. This year will be no
different.
I cannot account for the daily reminders that you have of 9/11, or for the fact
that George W. Bush happened to be acting as president that day. Most
likely you and I spent the day in similar ways: worried, fearful, watching,
waiting, listening and praying. I thought of my four friends who work in
Manhattan and hoped that they were okay. We may have reacted differently
Bob, but do not think for one moment that we were not united on that day.
I have no idea what Kerry did the morning of 9/11. He very well may not
have sprung to action, but how did Bush react? Isn't there a video document of
how Mr. Bush responded? How far beneath the earth did Cheney bury himself...
and for how long? Oh, the actions of our fearless leaders!
The United States Air Force began bombing Afghanistan on the 7th of October.
Was this reactionary? Yes, and devastatingly so for civilians in Afghanistan.
Was this response instantaneous? No, you and I can both do the math.
Bob, I stand beside you as someone who abhors the 9/11 terrorist attacks on
the United States; but I respectfully disagree with your interpretation of
the events and the implication that just because Bush happened to occupy the
White House at the time he deserves to serve a second term. There is
nothing about the actions of the terrorists -or Bush's reactions- that
logically mandates an uncontested second, third or fourth term. A la Ronald
Reagan, Americans don't let terrorists (or air traffic controllers) dictate
policy.
If you believe differently, let us agree that we will disagree. Let us each then
work for our respective political interests, because this is what our democracy
is about: pluralism, debate, joining together and working to make things better.
E Pluribus Unum, baby: out of many, one. Or to quote the Reverend Al
Green, "Lets stay together."
A few points of clarity are in order. I did not make this call to action
frivolously. I am a graduate student of modest income (an Illinois resident)
living and studying in London. Since January, I have made three attempts to
register for an absentee ballot and have not even received the self-addressed
stamped postcard back acknowledging my request.
Frustrated, I decided that I would save money and return home to work the campaign
the week preceding the election... and to vote. I hope and trust that you will not
have to go to such lengths to cast your vote, regardless of how you choose to
vote.
My rhetoric and invitation to Bobbi's friends was sincere and in keeping with
the extensively documented history of American political activism. If you
wish to challenge the subject of my speech or my political inclinations, that is
your prerogative, but do not accuse me of things that I have not done.
Kindest regards."
What I do hate is when I have to write shit like this.
Sometimes I worry about the long-term effects of that hammer to the head... and the years of cheese product on crackers. Was my call to action so bizarre?
Several days later MoveOn sent me an email underscoring the originality of my thought. The message from MoveOn went a little something like this:
"Just because you don't live in one of the 'swing' states doesn't mean you have
to sit this election out. We're looking for 10,000 people to adopt a key
battleground state voting district, or 'precinct'. These volunteers will partner
with local residents in that precinct to contact a few hundred voters, educate
them on the issues and the candidates, and turn them out to vote..."
Maybe it was not such a crazy crackpot hammer-to-the-head idea after all, eh?
Still the worst is over that I hope you understand
The you're one more hurdle over our protector of the land
Have a drink on me
I put it down to the company
Three cheers to the blue skinned beast hip hip!!!
To the blue skinned beast hip hip!!!
If you are interested in donating adopting a state, please contact MoveOn PAC at:
http://www.moveonpac.org/precinctpartners/signup.html Adam Christopher Snow © 2004