{"article":{"id":114211,"heading":"Dear George....","author":"AntiSpy","created":"2004-07-16 14:46:14","modified":"2004-07-16 14:46:14","last_modified":"Fri, 16 Jul 2004 21:46:14","article":"<p>Dear\r\nGeorge....\r\n<\/p><p>The voice within George Bush's head took up his pen.&nbsp; The Chosen One was\r\nfeeling the heat from those who questioned his actions and the Chosen One had\r\nasked his spiritual guide to put in writing a statement of praise and\r\nsupport.&nbsp; It was a strange request for the spiritual guide does not, under\r\nnormal circumstances, do letters.&nbsp; These were not normal circumstances,\r\nhowever.&nbsp; Much was on the line.&nbsp; Victory was near and the spiritual\r\nguide had no intention of allowing victory to be snatched by the jaws of\r\ndefeat.&nbsp; \"It's seldom that I come so close,\" thought the\r\nspiritual guide.&nbsp; \"If writing a letter will help, so be it!\"<\/p>\r\n<p>And thus he began the letter of support:<\/p>\r\n\r\n  <p><i>Dear George,<\/i><\/p>\r\n  <p><i>I have chosen you to do My bidding on\r\n  Earth.&nbsp; The voice you hear inside your head is, indeed, Mine.&nbsp; I\r\n  assure you that your devotion to my cause has won you a special place in my\r\n  heart.&nbsp; I am already preparing space for you here with me when your time\r\n  comes.<\/i><\/p>\r\n  <p><i>Your efforts to rid the world of the false\r\n  God \"Allah\" is most impressive.&nbsp; All of us here in the Great\r\n  Beyond are routing for you.&nbsp; The path you trod may be bloody, but it is,\r\n  in the end, all for the better.<\/i><\/p>\r\n  <p><i>Yes, my son, the End Times are near and it\r\n  has been your task to ensure that the end is ushered in exactly as I have\r\n  designed.&nbsp; Within your life time, I will send another and He will be the\r\n  Second Coming.&nbsp; All will be judged and the righteous, such as yourself,\r\n  will be brought to my side for an eternity.&nbsp; I will bring you and all who\r\n  follow you into My bosom and together we will enjoy the sweet smell of\r\n  eternity.<\/i><\/p>\r\n  \r\n    \r\n      \r\n        <p><i>Sincerely,<br>\r\n        God<\/i><\/p>\r\n      \r\n    \r\n  \r\n\r\n<p>Satan put down his pen.&nbsp; \"What is that smell?\" he asked.<\/p>\r\n<p>\"It's Hitler,\" said Satan's servant.<\/p>\r\n<p>\"Stick a fork in his ass, turn him over, he's done!\", Satan\r\nhissed.&nbsp; \"While you're at it, send this letter off to George.\"<\/p>\r\n\n","contact":"","link":"","address":"","phone":"","parent_id":0,"mime_type":"text\/html","summary":"God dashes off a letter to George Bush...","numcomment":0,"fileurl":"\/uploads\/","filesize":null,"article_url":"\/news\/2004\/07\/114211.php"},"attachments":[],"comments":[]}