{"article":{"id":42147,"heading":"What A Gas","author":"Paul Heller","created":"2003-03-28 14:30:49","modified":"2003-03-29 22:39:42","last_modified":"Sun, 30 Mar 2003 05:39:42","article":"

The Feds have finally admitted that Enron, and seven of its subsidiaries, were in fact gouging the lights out of California during the Big Energy Scare of George W. Bush's first year of service as our figurehead. Of course, Enron is bankrupt now, and so the $1.8 billion award given to the Left Coast will likely be borne by the taxpayers, while slicksters Jeff Skilling and Kenny Boy Lay enjoy their plush homes in tax-free Boca Raton, Florida. How it took so long to come to such a fundamentally obvious conclusion is a bit of a mystery in and of itself.

Today a whole new kind of energy gouging is taking place in the West, an undeniable pillaging of our family budgets. Only now, it isn't limited to the Golden State, but is spread out across the map, from Phoenix all the way up to the Canadian border. Check out these pump-prices. If you live out here, you should be very upset. If you live just about anyplace else in North America, feel free to laugh at us chumps:

Portland, Oregon: $1.99 a gallon. Oakland, California: $2.19 a gallon. Westminster, California: $2.09 a gallon. Reno, Nevada: $2.01 a gallon. Here in Phoenix, it sells for just over two bucks a gallon, and the newspaper today reports that the price of gasoline will in fact be going up some more as the war draws out long and painful.

But I discovered a funny thing the other day when I ran into a former colleague of mine, who drives truck for a living. I asked him if the price of gas was killing him or not. He shrugged. Where he lives, he said, it's only about $1.68. That's up in Yavapai County, in the town of Cordes Junction, about a third of the way from Phoenix up the hill to the quaint little town of Flagstaff (where gas is closer to $1.90).

That got me to scratching my head, so I sent out a few e-mails to people I know across the country. What I heard back sparked my curiosity even more, so I did a little bit of old-fashioned research on my new-fangled computer, and discovered that there is absolutely no uniformity to the gas prices across the United States, except that in every place but out here, it's cheaper. The exception, for some reason, is in Chicago, where it is still at about $1.99. But in Michigan, a couple of hours' drive away from the Windy City, it's forty cents a gallon less than that.

So here it is, a nice little slice of Americana for you, the pump prices from all the corners of what passes for this great nation anymore. Again, this will either make you sick or make you giddy. It doesn't matter which to me, as long as you know the truth. In Baltimore, butted up to the monuments and such, filling stations will sell you gasoline for $1.54 a gallon. Up in Buffalo, it's a little more for some reason, trickling out of the nozzle at $1.69. Charlotte, North Carolina is more like the capitol, at $1.55. Atlanta, Georgia sells it for $1.49, as does Houston, Texas and Lincoln, Nebraska. In Kansas City (the Missouri side, thank you), you'll pay just $1.45 a gallon.

Tulsa, Oklahoma has it on the cheap ($1.43), while Knoxville, Tennessee lets it go for $1.57, which is ten cents less per gallon than it costs in Denver, Colorado and Tallahassee, Florida. Cleveland has good prices, $1.45 a gallon. It's $1.60 in Salt Lake City, but if you want the bargain-basement price, you drive into Minneapolis, Minnesota, where it is a mere $1.35.

Of course, these prices are 48 to 96 hours old, so they may have gone up (or down, perhaps) since they were reported. In other words, since the Constitution's Fourteenth Amendment requires government to apply all laws equally unto all people, including laws that oversee the machinations of commerce, every American living outside of the Twin Cities is getting, well, the shaft. Big Oil is screwing America. We're not owed a tax cut; we're owned a boatload of cash that has been sucked out of our wallets and collected assiduously by the good friends of George W. Bush.

There are no oil refineries anywhere near Minneapolis that would grant it such low prices on gasoline. And they are about the coldest place in the Lower 48, which reveals the lie by the fuel industry that \"the demand for heating oil\" has forced the prices of petroleum products to rise.

Meanwhile, the unimportant yet expensive war that is being waged by the Bush administration in Iraq has crippled American consumer confidence. The stock market patriotically surged when the first bombs fell, but has since settled back into its preferred malaise. The airlines have lost twenty-five percent of their business in the last week, and have had to let go of over ten thousand workers. This administration, built to run on greed from Day One, has a once-vibrant economy sputtering on fumes.

If any conservative out there would like to explain this to me, perhaps using some sort of academic formula to show why this astounding disparity exists where gasoline prices are concerned, I would endeavor to entertain that. But, as with their chosen leader, these people are too cowardly to address anything directly, unless they can shoot it or blow it up. Any other approach would simply fail. Blood and oil is all they crave, and thus is all they have.

I find this government to be crude. As in, not refined. And as an American, I don't appreciate the grimy soot they leave behind, staining our flag for years to come.<\/p>\n","contact":"","link":"www.hellermountain.com","address":"","phone":"","parent_id":0,"mime_type":"text\/plain","summary":"Think you're paying too much for gas? You may be right...","numcomment":14,"fileurl":"\/uploads\/","filesize":null,"article_url":"\/news\/2003\/03\/42147.php"},"attachments":[],"comments":[{"id":42288,"heading":"I hate you","article":"Fuck off, poopyhead.","author":"Bush Admirer","parent_id":42147,"mime_type":"text\/plain","created":"2003-03-28 16:30:15","modified":"2003-03-28 16:30:15","fileurl":""},{"id":42296,"heading":"GAS","article":"I HAVE GAS FOR YOU....MMMMMM\r\n\r\nPOO POO In YOU","author":"FART HEAAAD","parent_id":42147,"mime_type":"text\/plain","created":"2003-03-28 16:37:50","modified":"2003-03-28 16:37:50","fileurl":""},{"id":42298,"heading":"Simple","article":"That would suit me just fine. I just love rolling in excrement. That's all that seems to come out of my mouth, as well.","author":"Simple Simon","parent_id":42147,"mime_type":"text\/plain","created":"2003-03-28 16:40:39","modified":"2003-03-28 16:40:39","fileurl":""},{"id":42309,"heading":"Simple","article":"Paul;\r\n\r\nFuel prices, my friend, are subject to the laws of supply and demand, but are also impacted dramatically by local government interference.\r\n\r\nIn California several years ago, green leaning politicians were pressured into passing legislation which would make gas sold in California the cleanest burning gas in America. They were warned that this meant higher prices for Californian customers due to increased refining costs - but damn the torpedoes! Full speed ahead!\r\n\r\nOnly problem was, the expensive additive that made gasoline burn cleaner, MTBE, was also rediculously toxic to ground water. Oops. In step the brilliant greens again - insisting that MTBE be removed and Ethanol be used in it's stead as a feul cleaner. Again, industry experts assert that the cost for additional refining will mean higher than normal fuel costs, but Californian politicians know that they won't feel the heat because increases in prices will be laid at the feet of the 'greedy' oil companies.\r\n\r\nAnother aspect of the problem lies in taxation. In BFE Arizona, where your pal the trucker comes from, there is a very small government structure which is largely self-sufficient. It hasn't occured to them to try to horn in on some free gas money. Now compare that with Chicago Illinois. Gas in Chicago is taxed by the State, the County, and the City. Everybody gets a cut. Because of that, Gas in the city is 50 cents more per gallon than it is in suburban Chicago or Northwest Indiana.\r\n\r\nAnother problem with your premise is one of intent. If you believe that the oil companies are all run by evil men who want to gouge the customer, why would they run the risk of raising prices so dramatically in some areas yet leave them so low in others? Wouldn't it make more sense to raise them everywhere? Then you would make more money and you wouldn't have any conspiracy theorists to deal with.\r\n","author":"Simple Simon","parent_id":42147,"mime_type":"text\/plain","created":"2003-03-28 16:56:00","modified":"2003-03-28 16:56:00","fileurl":""},{"id":42314,"heading":"blah blah blah---hey simple semen...","article":"see the IMC post on Halliburton getting the post-war contract and factor that into\r\nyour convuluted "explanation" or excuse that petroleum companies are not\r\na greed cabal.","author":"mediawatcher","parent_id":42147,"mime_type":"text\/plain","created":"2003-03-28 17:07:03","modified":"2003-03-28 17:07:03","fileurl":""},{"id":42317,"heading":"Med.Tech.","article":"Simple;\r\n An unbiased responce might carry more weight.\r\nGAS companies in a capitolistic economy not greedy?\r\nPlease, \r\n\r\n Bill","author":"Bill","parent_id":42147,"mime_type":"text\/plain","created":"2003-03-28 17:15:03","modified":"2003-03-28 17:15:03","fileurl":""},{"id":42318,"heading":"Simple","article":"Brilliant analysis as usual, Mediawatcher.\r\n\r\nSo insightful, so incisive.\r\n\r\nTell me, exactly what Haliburton has to do with anything?","author":"Simple Simon","parent_id":42147,"mime_type":"text\/plain","created":"2003-03-28 17:15:41","modified":"2003-03-28 17:15:41","fileurl":""},{"id":42343,"heading":"I hate to admit it but...","article":"...but Psympleton does have a small point. I don't think most people realize just how much local taxes can affect the prices of the Goods and Services you buy.\r\n\r\nHaving said that it is not that simple either. The Oil Industry is an Oligopoly (that means a small group of producers in an industry hard for other people to get started in). In an Oligopoly situation you are likely to have price fixing "arrangements". The Oil Industry in particular has been accused of this for decades. However it has never been conclusively proven. For some strange reason witnesses "have accidents" or "sudden changes of mind". Not that I would ever suggest the Oil Giants operate like a "criminal cartel". Nor would they help pervert our government into conquering new supplies for them. We all know "back room" deals never happen. That's just a big "Conspiracy Theory". Oh, by the way did I mention I have a nice Bridge for sale?","author":"Diogenes","parent_id":42147,"mime_type":"text\/plain","created":"2003-03-28 17:59:04","modified":"2003-03-28 17:59:04","fileurl":""},{"id":42360,"heading":"To Simpleton Simon","article":"I ran Halliburton, you oblivious retard! THAT'S what Halliburton has to do with it. Now, go back to learning your ABC's and keep the discussion to the mature adults.","author":"Dick Cheney","parent_id":42147,"mime_type":"text\/plain","created":"2003-03-28 18:40:08","modified":"2003-03-28 18:40:08","fileurl":""},{"id":42681,"heading":"Simple","article":"Oh, sorry, Mr. Cheney. Unless I hear it from Fox News, I won't believe it.","author":"Simple Simon","parent_id":42147,"mime_type":"text\/plain","created":"2003-03-29 00:26:52","modified":"2003-03-29 00:26:52","fileurl":""},{"id":43404,"heading":"Simple","article":"Ronald Reagan used to be an actor. Are you saying we invaded Grenada for Warner Brothers?","author":"Simple Simon","parent_id":42147,"mime_type":"text\/plain","created":"2003-03-29 22:22:12","modified":"2003-03-29 22:22:12","fileurl":""},{"id":43405,"heading":"Help, please","article":"Will one of you conservative rednecks please wipe the drool off of my chin? By the way, what year is it?","author":"Ronald Reagan","parent_id":42147,"mime_type":"text\/plain","created":"2003-03-29 22:23:54","modified":"2003-03-29 22:23:54","fileurl":""},{"id":43422,"heading":"Simple","article":"Little spotty-faced spoiled children with pants that are too big and who like to listen to 'gangsta rap' shouldn't belittle great men who have serious medical conditions.\r\n\r\nPut your cap on straight, comb your hair, take that stupid visor off, and get a job.\r\n\r\nRight now, you're just a cowardly little weasel who hides behinds other's nicknames.\r\n\r\n","author":"Simple Simon","parent_id":42147,"mime_type":"text\/plain","created":"2003-03-29 22:39:42","modified":"2003-03-29 22:39:42","fileurl":""}]}